Living Together
...  Advice  ...

• Life Lines:  The Face in the Mirror, by Tom Verner    

• Advice:  Coming Soon, The Karma Czar

• Links to Living Together On-Line:  Instant Karma & Other On-Line Stuff

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Coming Soon, The Karma Czar

For those of you who've been reading DownStreet for a while, you probably remember our now-departed {not for the other world, but for Florida} advice columnist, Gola di Montagni, who left us unexpectedly late last winter to follow her childhood dream of riding U.S. 1 from Mile 0.  We caught up with Gola in Florida back then, wished her well, then set out to find a new advice columnist.

Several folks eventually applied for the job, and we had a hard time choosing.  Finally, we narrowed it down to two people.  ...  And now?

Now we've made our choice.  ...

Among the letters and résumés we received, for reasons which will shortly become obvious, one stood out from among the rest:  It was a reasonably solid résumé, with a very solid cover letter.  But one of the things that made it stand out was how it was signed  ...  

That's right.  The Karma Czar !?!  ...

That was it.  No other name.  And when {we'll confess} we tried to look up the phone number this mysterious applicant had included, no luck.  It was unlisted.  Of course, Gola's, too, was an unlisted number.  Like most advice columnists, she treasured her privacy and, in her case, her relative anonymity, as well.  So, at least on that score, there was nothing particularly unusual here.  Nor was this person's choice of a pseudonym.  We'd received several other pseudonymous applications, though the others also included their actual names, as well.

At first were ready to dismiss The Karma Czar's application, speculating about what he or she must be like.  But then we had to admit to ourselves:  We had no idea, not really.  All we knew was what was written -- a solid enough background in counseling and education, and a cover letter that we couldn't ignore, most of which we offer you here.  {From the letter, we were supposing it was a he.}  

After a brief introduction about background and credentials, the letter began ...

...  I'm weary I tell you, of therapists who repeat the last thing you say, or ask how that makes you feel.  I'm also weary of a lot of what passes for education, where they've banished the soul from the classroom in favor of facts and figures.  But kids want to know about their souls.  Sure, they're confused and all pumped on their hormonal rushes half the time, but they know in their bones what really matters.  But most of all, I'm weary of what passes for advice these days.  ...

{It was probably at that point that the writer had our attention.}

Most of the advice you see in most of the advice columns or hear on the radio is useless.  Don't get me wrong.  If the main question is etiquette, or what's in it for me, then I suppose that stuff passes.  But who needs that kind of advice?  The real question is "How will this affect my karma?"

You can call it by some other name if you want.  Maybe it's bread on the waters, or soul-searching.  Whatever.  What you call it doesn't really matter.  What matters is, is this good?  Is this right?  Because, if you believe in karma, and it isn't, you could come back as a toad, or -- no offense to toads -- even worse.  But even if you don't believe in karma, then maybe it's a matter of not ending up in hell, or just plain miserable without knowing why.  Whatever.  Everybody knows in their bones that what goes around comes around. So you can call it what you like.  But the only real question is, "How you gonna act?  How you gonna be?"

We read on.  ...

Look.  I'm not saying I have all the answers.  Nobody does.  But I care enough about my own soul so that I won't end up giving advice just because it might make me look or sound good.  I refuse to do that at the expense of giving advice that might actually help somebody take care of their own soul.  And if I don't know what to say, if I don't know what the answer might be, then I won't say anything, or I'll say I don't know.  I think lots of advice columnists must get some real stumpers, but you never see them printed.  The only stuff they print is the stuff they think they have the answers for.  But saying "I don't know" isn't just good for your soul.  Bad advice is a whole lot worse than no advice at all.  It can do some damage.

So, like I already said, I don't have all the answers.  But I think I have a pretty good sense of what questions to ask.  Half the time when I read some of these advice columns or listen to the radio, I hear the situation, then I hear the questions they ask, and I think to myself, no, that's not the point.  I've thought for a long time now that getting the question clear, getting it on target so to speak, is half the battle.  If you want to do the right thing, then you need to ask the right question.

Alright, then, we thought.  We had a couple of question of our own.  So we picked up the phone and called.  ...

We'd found our new advice columnist.  ...  The Karma Czar.

Starting with our January Thaw issue, then, the Karma Czar will become DownStreet's new advice columnist.  Meanwhile, if you have questions you'd like to submit, you can send them to ..

karamczar@downstreetmagazine.com

If it's urgent, The Karma Czar has told us that he will be happy to reply by e-mail before the column begins.  All correspondence is kept strictly confidential.

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